Answered Someday

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Through the night my mind’s afar,
I wish to seek my unanswered questions.
Needing to let go of emotional scars,Preventing emotional erections.
  
Seek, seek, and again seek,
Why can’t the answers return?
Why must I become so meek?
When will letting go, be my turn?
   
How can emotions control me so?
They emerge from my soul,
Yet, hurt me to know. 
I need to learn how to let them go.
   
This internal turmoil is bleeding my heart. 
This exhausting emotional dance binds my spirit.
This inner torture tears me apart,
My mind now cannot even hear it.
   
From where do these feelings reside?
Where can I throw them away?
When can I no longer hide?
Why do these emotions seem stay?
   
All these thoughts run through me,
Each and every day.
I cannot wait to see,
My questions answered someday. 

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12 thoughts on “Answered Someday

  1. i take from this poem a sense of beauty, of melancholy, of hard-earned wisdom. beautifully turned. tony

  2. I know what you are feeling, well, to a point as I am not sure we all have the same experiences. I also do know that as time goes by, the questions become more and more irrelevant, not unimportant, but they just don’t seem to take up as much ‘mind space’ as they did when I was younger. Now I am turning 50, and I can say if I sit quietly, the questions will return, but the answers aren’t so important anymore. I know the answers, I see what happens in the real world, and I have been in intimate contact with families and children who have gone through what I have. Sadly, one of those children will probably be forever institutionalized due to her abuse, but her sister is quite the opposite and is making strides way beyond what we all expected. I do know she will have questions one day, and perhaps she will be tied up like you are. I can only hope that when that day arrives, she is still in contact with me, or has someone of strength, like I did, to get through all the questions. The answers are the world is crap; men have to show power over women or females in the only way they can; and karma will come back to them. I have seen karma at work, and have no doubt, and I don’t necessarily want to be a witness when it does. Take a deep breath, try some meditation, and relax. Let your brain drain the questions. If you need, you may always contact me in private. I have had years of counseling of my own, and years of training as a counselor, so if I can’t answer your questions or cannot find some resolve for your pain, I will not gloss it over and not pay the pain due respect.

    • I am so sorry for your family’s hardships and wish you all the very best. I believe in karma as well, always have. I have tried meditation in the past and it either hasn’t helped or put me to sleep. I have tried counseling in the past, some has helped and some not. I Thank you for wanting to help me, it’s very kind of you. You have a beautiful soul to want to help someone you do not know. Thank you for being so sweet.

      • It wasn’t made lightly. I would love to help you if I can. Meditation is something I had to work at. Now I have a friend who has two kids 8 and 5, who can meditate for 3 hours. Granted they went through Jujitsu or something training, but their instructor fell asleep last session.

      • That is very sweet of you. What worries me with meditation is I seem to have stronger emotions. It’s like they come at me from every direction. Strange I know. I have kids as well, 2 boys ages 7 & 1. Have you ever heard of anyone feeling 10 times more with meditation?

      • Yes, actually I have. I had to learn to channel it, it was a visual my counselor and I worked on. There are also good books on it, which I have in storage so I couldn’t get you the titles right off. Sucks! I will do a post explaining how I do the visualization, which is the best I can offer without being able to access my old books. Look for the post tomorrow, as I have been having a severe fibro flare today and am not worth much. But, the intense feelings are bound to be there as they are all waiting to be heard, not unusual. Meditation is not all peace and quiet, a lot of the times for me, it can be real noisy in my head, and there are other times I can simply just hear the music, and that is all I need.

      • Wow, not many people have been able to understand what I go through with meditation. It becomes so overwhelming it’s scary at times. Thank you so much for your help. You’re very kind. 🙂

      • Just sent you a tweet. I don’t normally use twitter, but I wasn’t sure how to reach immediately. Part 1 & 2 are done. Really take some time with them. I am having a wonderful fibro day, so I am going to stop now. I will continue tomorrow. Please feel free to twitter me, and I will just check it more often, with any questions.

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